Chapter X

 A week after Ruby's passing. Time takes on another quality. I recall her in different moments in our 7 years of companionship. I think she has been gone for two weeks, but it's only been one. That's confusing. Maybe it's because of this elastic time quality, where she's now a memory from a few days ago or a few years ago. Just trying to ride the wave of grief; to be here for it and not get towed under. Speaking of water, the winter rains have finally arrived and it's pouring. It's been a very dry winter so far. The land needs the rain. All the California crops that feed the rest of the country need it. The golden hills are greening up already.

And now what do we have here? Food gone bad or basic biology? This is what's left of a cutting from my Begonia monstera plant. A friend of mine obtained a leaf from a fine specimen plant from the greenhouse of Luther Burbank Center in Santa Rosa a few years back. That resulting Begonia begot another and another plant whose leaves were carried home by eager recipients in wet paper towels to root. The leaves of the Begonia monstera, as indicated by it's name, are very large. It bears beautiful small white flowers, but the leaves are the prize. I had two plants which kept diminishing in health despite my efforts. I took the last leaf off the last plant and thought I'd start all over again. It took root in it's jar, but I neglected it and the leaf turned rotten. I cut that off and kept the roots in a jar and a tiny plant emerged.  Still I ignored it- sorry..... But the life force of this begonia is evidently very strong, so here goes.

Investigating containers, investigating spare

Not for the faint of heart

For Ruby, our best and most sweetest of wonders.
I've pondered the appropriateness of including a photograph of one's beloved pet laid for her viewing on a floral blog, so forgive me if this is over the top (in the image you see Ruby the white cat and her brother Buddy, the black cat taking it all in).  In working with flowers we try to help commemorate such a range of life experiences from the most joyful to the most sombre moments. My own experience has been such that I've had to say goodbye to so many family, friends,and animals (and I'm not that old) that I've lost a degree of fear around death- or leastways the handling and viewing one's loved one in a more informal setting. Some of my friends tell me a viewing of a beloved one, no matter what the species, is unacceptable to them. I get it. It's a matter of culture and perspective and I respect it all. This is my way of  honoring a more difficult aspect of this beautiful experience we call LIFE.

Ruby's amazing story: 
About 10 years ago, she was abandoned and left to live outside fend for herself. The exposure to the sun on a white cat resulted in skin cancer. When she was finally rescued our vet, Stan was consulted on her skin condition. He fell in love with her, but had no room for her. So begins another chapter when she was given to a woman who had a terminal illness and was waiting to go to Switzerland because she chose to end her life at a clinic there. This woman decided to put her two animals down first because she didn't want to leave them behind. But her timing was not good and she was left with her illness and grieving her two animals, waiting to go to Switzerland. Enter Ruby, who was her hospice companion during the period of waiting, bonding with the woman, never leaving her, being Nurse Ruby.

Then again Ruby had no place to live! My vet told me about Ruby when I already had a cat. Having struggled with mild allergies to cats,  I was not wild about adopting another one. But who wouldn't be taken with Ruby's plight? Finally we decided to take Ruby in. She got treatment for her skin cancer before we brought her home. By that time, I had just decided to pick her up, sight unseen. But Stan the vet said " I think you had better come meet her first". Huh? What I saw was a spitting, hissing, ball of fur. What were we getting ourselves into?  When Stan picked her up to put her in her cat box to come home with us, she bit him. I think she had just HAD it with having no home and enduring the painful treatment. This was 7 years ago. The exact moment when we bonded was when our current cat, Moo Shu disappeared once again for a long period (we had just found him after he had been missing for 3 months). I began to cry and Ruby crawled into my lap and started purring. Thus began our chapter with Nurse Ruby, the most gentle, nurturing cat, the best and most sweetest of wonders.

Christmas past

 What's that about Christmas? It's so yesterday. This year we were so busy that we had one week to bring the holiday spirit into our house and put it on the table, culminating with a really lovely salmon dinner for 12 friends and extended family at our house. We didn't even have a tree, but a "sculpture" which I would share  with you, but it just looks too strange in photographs. But though there was no tree, there were no lack of flowers, no lack of Decorations, or should I say Alterations? Please forgive the edge of cynicism. This Christmas dream stuff is serious business and not always easy in case you've forgotten already. Some people love it and others wince; it's not neutral, it's emotionally painful, too Christian, too... I can relate- every year I sit in the middle, waffling between the agony and the ecstasy. This holiday season that we engage in or try to skirt around and resist involves about one month out of the year. That is a heck of a lot of time. So give yourself a little pat on the back. You've come through to the other side again. And you may be wishing, like myself to do a little hibernating as you may be a wee bit plumper. Maybe followed by hiking or skiing or getting back into the garden. And if you live in California, you know that spring is very close, very close indeed.